If it weren’t for the magistrate’s trust in The Cottage, 34-year-old Jaafar would still be behind bars.
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An addict, Jaafar takes full responsibility for jeopardising his own chances of ever getting the second shot he’s been given at reinventing himself with the help of the drug and alcohol rehabilitation home in Shepparton.
“This is my second time here. The first time I made a mistake and got booted out,” Jaafar said.
“It was my own mistake, I broke my bail conditions and the guys here had to do what they had to do.”
He says The Cottage staff’s actions were the main reason he was bailed again this time.
“The judge’s words were, ‘The actions of The Cottage were so powerful, that gives me hope and trust in them to let you back out’,” Jaafar said.
“So I’m very grateful for Rob (Bryant, The Cottage co-founder) and Aaron (Gilhooley, The Cottage manager) for batting for me again and seeing the opportunity in me.”
He said after being in prison for 12 months, the first time being at the rehabilitation space wasn’t easy for him.
“You lose hope, you don’t see hope anywhere, because for the last 14 years I’d been using, using, using — and what hope is there using drugs?” Jaafar said.
He said he’d lasted three weeks before he “stuffed up”.
“This time around, things are looking better,” he said.
Jaafar is five weeks into his 12-week program and says he is looking forward to the next seven weeks.
“There’s good boys here, good leadership, you know what I mean, it just gives you hope to see blokes leaving and achieving the program,” he said.
“It’s gonna be a long road after here, but they give us the right tools to deal with things afterwards and then it’s up to us.”
He said The Cottage had quickly felt like his home and he couldn’t wait to get back to its safety zone after outings with staff for essential needs.
He admits that might add to his challenges at the end of his 12-week journey with The Cottage, but he’s confident the coping skills he’s learning will equip him for the adjustment.
“When we get to third phase, after two months, we have to start planning what we’re going to do after here, that’s on us, they can only give us the tools,” Jaafar, who entered the second of three phases at the beginning of week five, said.
His priority is getting to see his two children again.
“I started going to jail from 2019. Before that I’d never been to jail, but that’s when I split up with my ex, lost my kids, so I ended up back on the streets,” Jaafar said.
“I was homeless. That’s when my drug use really started to skyrocket.”
His first stint in prison was 12 months, followed by 11 months of further addiction and crime, before ending up back in the pen.
“That’s two-and-a-half-three years of my life gone, you know,” Jaafar lamented.
“So then I had to choose if I wanted to come out and do something that would set me on the right track or just go and do the same thing that I was doing and go back to jail.
“When I was in jail, I’d see the same people come around and end up back in jail. It’s not what I want to do. There comes a time when you’ve gotta say, ‘Enough’s enough’.”
He said while there’d been a lot of jail, now there was a lot of hope.
“It is hard, I mean, there’s nothing easy, but it is good,” Jaafar said.
“I mean, it’s easier than being in the streets using though.”
While he’s feeling confident in recovery this time around, he is wary that nothing is promised.
“You can’t predict the future, but it’s the best I’ve done in years, so I can’t see myself going back. I’m working too hard for it to just fall back into old habits,” Jaafar said.
“It’s not fair on me, it’s not fair on my kids, it’s not fair on all the people who are around me who’ve helped me to get here.
“I’m doing my best to stay out of trouble.”
His stay at The Cottage will come to an end around Christmas.
The trade-qualified fabricator and housepainter plans to return close to family and get work with them, hopefully doing the same kind of work he knows.
“It might not be something I jump into straight away, but slowly-slowly because I haven’t worked for years, you know,” Jaafar said.
“But at the same time, I’m jumping in here (at The Cottage) just helping with whatever needs to be done, just to keep my time going and get back to reality.
“And it’s charity work, so it helps them out as well. It’s a way I can give back something with something I can afford and something I can do.”
∎ For more information on The Cottage, visit thecottage.org.au
∎ If you’re struggling with addiction, call DirectLine 24 hours a day, seven days a week on 1800 888 236
Senior journalist